[ Hei knows he's not playing fair. At her age, you carry neither the fuel nor the fodder to fight off his arguments. She doesn't yet understand that his weapon is sophistry. That he can find any shape of logic to fit his needs. Maybe that's another way his profession, Heaven's war, has subtly ruined him. Like the rancid smell of corpses each morning that has cored a hole through his insides. Like the pressure of living and fighting and sleeping with five hundred caged animals that has carved deep lines in his flesh. ]
[ But even worse than the tenacity of his psyche is the stubbornness of his circumstances. It'd be great to wander around like a tinker with his cart, peddling goodness to anyone who'll take it. But it's hard to do a selling job when it can't even keep your loved ones safe. You can talk about being a good man, choosing the righteous path, hoping to convince yourself you're doing the right thing walking away from the bloodshed of the past. Breaking the circle. But it won't keep his friends safe, and that's a fact. The circle keeps turning, whatever you try. And slipping back into the Reaper's skin ... it might not answer any questions. It sure won't make the world a prettier place or the sun shine brighter. But it's better than the alternative. It's a damn stretch better. ]
[ He doesn't move when she starts for the door. It's only when she speaks does he lift his head. Her wording is ambiguous -- either grateful or uncertain or both. But he understands what it means. Her way of giving in. An inch's worth. It's more than he deserves. ]
[ Hei swallows, and counts to himself in the silence. Feels the tug of the invisible lead gathering momentum between them, energy zinging. Then -- yes. In another moment he is loping to his feet. Coming up close behind her, his hands skimming across her shoulders, his mouth questing through her hair to touch the nape of her neck. ]
[ Perhaps a You're welcome -- or I'm sorry -- or I'm glad you didn't leave. Perhaps all three. ]
no subject
[ But even worse than the tenacity of his psyche is the stubbornness of his circumstances. It'd be great to wander around like a tinker with his cart, peddling goodness to anyone who'll take it. But it's hard to do a selling job when it can't even keep your loved ones safe. You can talk about being a good man, choosing the righteous path, hoping to convince yourself you're doing the right thing walking away from the bloodshed of the past. Breaking the circle. But it won't keep his friends safe, and that's a fact. The circle keeps turning, whatever you try. And slipping back into the Reaper's skin ... it might not answer any questions. It sure won't make the world a prettier place or the sun shine brighter. But it's better than the alternative. It's a damn stretch better. ]
[ He doesn't move when she starts for the door. It's only when she speaks does he lift his head. Her wording is ambiguous -- either grateful or uncertain or both. But he understands what it means. Her way of giving in. An inch's worth. It's more than he deserves. ]
[ Hei swallows, and counts to himself in the silence. Feels the tug of the invisible lead gathering momentum between them, energy zinging. Then -- yes. In another moment he is loping to his feet. Coming up close behind her, his hands skimming across her shoulders, his mouth questing through her hair to touch the nape of her neck. ]
[ Perhaps a You're welcome -- or I'm sorry -- or I'm glad you didn't leave. Perhaps all three. ]